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Thursday, 1 March 2018

JOKES CAMP SOCIAL MEDIA LINKS

πŸ‘» *JπŸ˜‚KES CAMP SOCIAL MEDIAS* πŸ‘»

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★ _JOKES CAMP 1 WHATSAPP GROUP CHAT_ πŸ‘‰πŸ½  https://chat.whatsapp.com/FWButfLWupe7kGI13bpdsx

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Kindly DM the following Admins if you are unable to join any of the platformsπŸ‘ŒπŸ½

*Teemike*
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*Sterling*
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Wednesday, 28 February 2018

STERLING'S TV

Hey guys join The Sterling's Tv🌍,it's really cool and interesting,where you get funny memes 🀣and learn new things,updates, *Pranks* discoveries,where you take savagery classesπŸ˜‚ and many more
Very easy to join just tap on the link it'll automatically take you to gee sterlings DM and *save the number as STERLING'S TV*
[url=https://api.whatsapp.com/send?phone=2348131234863]STERLING'S TV[/url]
Send your name and save the number as Sterling's Tv

Tuesday, 27 February 2018

FEAR WOMEN

AFTER GOD, FEAR WOMAN!COPIED DIS I DON'T  KNOW HOW TRUE I COULD FEAR WOMAN
1. You are asking for her number another guy is deleting that very number from his phone.
2. One guy texts her "Good morning" another dude is texting her "thanks for last night"
3. While one man is busy consoling and comforting her for menstrual pains, another dude is busy rejoicing because she's not pregnant.
4. When you go through your girlfriend's phone never look for messages with guys. Look for chats between her and her best friend that's where the heartbreaking truth is.
5. A man can work for 10 years with unemployed wife and still be happy. But a woman will work 5 days and the whole community will know about the unemployed husband.
6. She calls you while secretly hoping you won't pick up the call so that she can blame you later for not answering her call.
7. No one has more cousins and uncles than a cheating girlfriend. My brother, no matter how beautiful or humble she can be never ever trust a woman with all your heart.
8. If you help a lady when she's in trouble, she will surely remember you when she's in trouble again. Be extra careful my brothers and stop the habit of making promises during sex otherwise you will die poor.
9. "I love you unconditionally"...that's a lie my brother, a man is loved under the condition that he provides.
10. Brotherman... work hard, make money and don't waste your time and energy lifting heavy objects in the gym so as to look attractive, no African lady can choose six packs over six cars

RANDOM JOKES FROM NO.1-11

Random Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

1. “They applauded the white man that discovered the airplane that travelled to London in 7hrs but overlooked a black woman that can travel to London in 30min…when do we want to stop racism

2. Igbo men selling Casket be like, “Oga, dis Coffin na original, 2mins your Mama don reach heaven πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€

4. That awful moment when u finish eating gala inside bus and u throw your phone outta the window instead of the nylonπŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
Just jejely get down and remove your sim
Cos your village people have won the battleπŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ€£πŸ€£

5. Dat ugly moment when your girlfriend throws you on the bed, trying to be sexy, but you hit your head on the bedstead and die…
hell fire straight…..

6. That Awkward moment……… When u are laffin so hard with ur crush…. Den a HEAVY CATARRH jump out of ur nose…
😁😁😁😁😁😁
FADALURD TAKE MY SOUL .

7. There’s nothing scarier than using the toilet at
your crush’s place and it refuses to flush. You’ll
just be staring at your shit like. . . Please go, i’m
begging you in the name of ur mother, just go. . . . πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜…

8. A drunkard just got on a bus and the bus started
moving. So his wallet was stolen by the person
who was sitting at the back. after while he
realised that his wallet was stolen
Drunkard with a loud voice ‘who ever has stolen
my wallet should give me back else what
happened in 1975 will repeat itself today so the
people in bus were afraid including the driver.
After some moments the one who stole the wallet
was scared and politely gave the wallet back to
the drunkard
so a curious girl asked the drunkard “sir wat
happened in 1975?
Drunkard: some one stole my wallet and i had to
walk by foot to reach home

9. 3 Reasons to take a girl for swimming on first date…
#1.The water will wash away her makeup and reveals her natural face…
#2.You can ascertain her true assets, no push-up bras or ass pads… And the most importantly
#3.From the way she reacts to the water, you can tell if she has a marine spirit 🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

10. I’ve never seen a barren Calabar woman before, that’s how fertile those babes can be. Whisper i love you to her ears booooom she’s pregnantπŸ˜‚

11. Witchcraft is when you finally convince that babe that has being giving you tough time for so long, just when you take her you found out that the house key is *misplaced*πŸ™„,,,,,my brother you will even consider getting her in through the window!😜

FUNNY SOLUTION TO MATHEMATICS

Maths Trouble πŸ˜‚
Teacher wrote on the board,
36x + yx, 2/3yx + 3x (66y + 12x).b =0
He turned to Musa and said, "Solve the problem."
Musa picked the duster, cleaned the board and said,
"Problem solved!
πŸ™ŠπŸ™ŠπŸ˜‚

FUNNY JAMB QUESTIONS

JAMB QUESTIONS 2018.

1. Animals that eat money are called...

A. Carnivores.
B. Omnivores.
C. Monivores.
D. Herbivores.

2. What is the natural habitat for naira-eating snakes?

A. Aquatic
B. Jamb headquarters
C. Terrestrial
D. Forest

3. The process by which a snake swallows money is called...

A. Phagocytosis
B. Engulfing
C. Pinocytosis
D. Embezzlement.

4. What will snake drink after swallowing huge some of money....

A. Water
B. Gulder
C. Hennessy
D. All of the above.

5. What kind of snake can swallow N36million Naira only......

A. Ejola
B. Python
C. Oka
D. Anaconda

6. In what country in Africa that snakes swallows money in an office......

A. Zimbabwe
B. Egpty
C. Naija
D. Kenya

 7. The study of snake swallowing money can be best described as..........

A. Snakenology
B. Olelology
C. Corruptology
D. All of the above

8. If the snake is arrested and taken to the court by the EFCC will it win the case.......

A. Yes.... Since there's no evidence against the innocent snake
B. No..... The EFCC will win the case since the snake is not a politician.
C. Yes & No.
D. The Judge will throw the case out.

9. Snake that can swallow money is dangerous to be in the society because it may start robbing the banks....

A. False
B. True
C. Maybe
D. I don't think so.

10. Let assume the snake is sentence to jail how many years do you think it will spend in jail....

A. Just a year
B. 3 and half years
C. 43 years
D. Life in prison.

Bonus questions it carries 40 marks... Answer careful please.

If it turned out that it was the Jamb officials that swallowed the money but they lied against the innocent snake, what should snake do?

A. Swallow all of them alive.
B. Forgive and forget.
C. Demand for it's share of the money.
D. Leave Naija for Ghana.